Not Ready

Its 2 in the morning.  In four hours, I will wake to my final day of high school.  I can't even believe this is happening.  No moment has ever been this bittersweet.  I really don't think I'm ready to do this.  I've been telling myself for the past 14 months that life in Ames is going to be great and I'll do just fine but that was just a shield to hide behind the fact that Kennedy is my home.  I have another home, but Kennedy is really where I'm at.  I can't begin to compare myself to the person I was coming out of Franklin.  So much has happened to me here that I can't imagine life without it.  Even during breaks, it was all about Kennedy.  My life has been focused around band and homework for the past four years.  My friends have been entirely out of Kennedy and overwhelmingly in the band program.  I'm not going to be in the Kennedy band next year.  Am I going to fall off the deep end like I did in my transition four years ago?  I am being forced out of my water.  I can't do this.